The Green Monster

He didn't used to be big. That green monster. He started out awfully small, in fact. Barely perceptible. But then, he grew, and grew, and grew. Until he was the big elephant in the room.

This green monster seemed to infiltrate every area of life. Putting up barriers and obstacles to greater emotional depth and understanding.

This green monster was jealousy.

Unfortunately, he had become all too familiar and had become a regular attender at meetings with those who were most important to me. Since I had not recognized his presence, he was neither welcomed nor shunned. And so, in our company he stayed.

It was not until about a week ago that he was banished from the room.

The conversation began, and tension rose as he and I began to have a chat.

"Why don't you have what he has?" said the green monster.

I couldn't answer. My typical response was to throw a pity party; an act that not only accepted the green monster as a guest, but actually celebrated his presence. But this could not go on. The party must come to an end.

I confronted the green monster for what he was. That green monster was not the root of the problem. In fact, he was only an unwelcomed side-effect of a deeper rooted issue: a lack of contentment.

Wishing for the talents of one friend, the grades of another, and the blessings of yet another, demonstrate that I am not comfortable with myself.

Essentially, I am saying: I don't want to be me. The me that God created me to be is not good enough.

This is both ungrateful and fails to recognize the special and unique gifts and talents that the Lord has given me.

The green monster is surreptitious. He creeps in unawares. But he is not more powerful than our God.

Surrendering our lives fully, embracing the talents that we have, and even recognizing that the Lord can use us despite our inadequacies should help us to be comfortable with the person that God created us to be.